krabapple: (west wing donna golden field)

Bad Wolf

I Create Myself

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Created on 2009-05-01 21:00:44 (#187220), last updated 2013-03-08 (236 weeks ago)

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Birthdate:Apr 1
Location:Atlanta, Georgia, United States of America
The silence of the earth seemed to merge with the silence of the heavens, the mystery of the earth touched with the mystery of the stars . . . Alyosha stood gazing and suddenly, as if he had been cut down, threw himself to the earth.

He did not know why he was embracing it, he did not try to understand why he longed so irrisistibly to kiss it, to kiss all of it, but he was kissing it, weeping, sobbing, and watering it with his tears, and he vowed estatically to love it, to love it unto ages and ages. "Water the earth with the tears of your joy, and love those tears . . .," rang in his soul. What was he weeping for? Oh, in his rapture he wept even for the stars that shone on him from the abyss, and "he was not ashamed of this ecstasy." It was as if threads from all those innumerable worlds of God all came together in his soul, and it was trembling all over, "touching other worlds." He wanted to forgive everyone and for everything , and to ask for forgiveness, oh, not for himself! but for all and for everything, "as others are asking for me," rang again and again in his soul. But with each moment he felt clearly and almost tangibly something as firm and immovable as this heavenly vault descend into his soul. Some sort of idea, as it were, was coming to reign in his mind--now for the whole of his life and unto ages of ages. He fell to the earth a weak youth and rose up a fighter, steadfast for the rest of his life, and he knew it and felt it suddenly, in that very moment of his ecstasy. Never, never, in all his life would Alyosha forget that moment. "Someone visited my soul in that hour" he would say afterwards, with firm belief in his words . . .

Three days later he left the monastery, which was also in accordance with the words of his late elder, who had bidden him to "sojourn in the world."
The Brothers Karamazov
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